Milo's periodic journal of
learning, life-tips, and laughter

Don't miss "Milo's Big Day" story in red below!

Finding the unseen solution in compromise

A colleague of mine, "Nigel" is a couples' counselor.  He was comfortable sharing this story with me, as it was many years prior and no names of clients were mentioned.

"Tom" and "Laverne" could handle the big problems of their relationship better than many couples; it was the little things that unnerved them.  One problem that came up far too often in sessions was Laverne's habit of leaving the cap off the toothpaste in the bathroom. 

Tom grew livid when she would do it again.  Laverne claimed that she tried to remember, but got no credit for the 95% of the time that she did remember to.  Plus, she couldn't see what was so terrible about Tom putting it back on for her now and then, considering all the favors she did for him.

One week, Nigel brought out a paper bag during one of their sessions and said, "I have a gift for you two.  I don't normally buy things for my clients but I wanted to see if it might help."

Laverne reached in and pulled out a container of Colgate that was not in a tube.  The cap wasn't a screw-off type; it was a hinge.

"I'm not sure if I like this brand," she said.

"I'm not sure I trust her to re-do the hinge lid any more than the screw cap," Tom added.

Nigel said, "She's more likely to remember since it takes only one hand to squeeze and close.  If she forgets, this cap will never get lost or hit the floor.  And, Laverne, are you really so unwilling to find out if you like it?

"No, I suppose not.  I've seen these in stores.  They're more expensive than tubes, though."  Tom nodded in agreement.

"More expensive than your ongoing frustration, plus the total time you two have spent talking about it here at $125 per hour?" Nigel queried.

The couple looked at each other and laughed.  As their therapy sessions continued, not only did they never fight about toothpaste again, but "Let's look for a Colgate solution" became a signal:  Look for an answer that is neither his way nor hers, but a different approach that could suit both.

Office and client frustrations can be the same way.  Whether it's a wise manager playing peacemaker or you yourself finding a way to quell a problem with someone you deal with, see where you might be missing the Colgate solution that could bring peace to everyone involved.

A great teambuilding session like TEAMprovising can help teammates start to see new ways of thinking about problems, both old and new.

Milo's big day is here at last: Wed Dec 16! 

Thrilled that my new book, below, recently made it to the top of the Kindle list in its category of youth non-fiction before I ever got a chance to promote it to my mailing list!  And now, at long last, the paperback launch!

The paperback goes public Wed Dec. 16!  And for that one day, I'm marking it down from its base price of $19.95 to
the lowest I could convince Amazon to list it at -- only $6.64!  Why am I doing that?  I'm asking my friends, family, and colleagues to consider buying at least one copy on that day to support me. 

JUST $6.64 for this $19.95 paperback:
Wed Dec. 16 only! 
Click image for more!

My personal goal for this launch, on that one day, is to reach number one on Amazon in its category.  At $6.64, I'll literally make nothing on each purchase; it's all about getting it to number one.  As you buy books, strangers see its rise, so it's on their radar. 

If you're in the US or Canada, ordering it on Dec 16 will still get it off to that teen (or teens) whom you know could benefit from being more effective speaking in and after college.

To order this fun & effective resource:
save this note, set a reminder, and link here on the launch day, Wed Dec 16.

More about the book itself:  I received numerous requests related to my original book "Public Speaking: Get A's, Not Zzzzzz's!", asking if it was appropriate for teens...and I never knew quite what to say.  It wasn't inappropriate, but the examples were very business-y and the tone wasn't meant for teens. I realized, "There's a need here!"  The result is this book!

Public Speaking Tip of the Day

Ask yourself what an important theme is in your message.  Let's say you decide it's "clarity".  Then Google "famous quotes clarity" and in about 10 seconds you'll have hundreds of quotes to choose from.

For either openings or closings, it's a great way to quickly come up with something like:

"We may be overcomplicating our company's sales pitch.  German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer once said:
'One should use common words to say uncommon things.

I think we need to remember that." 

Look how intelligent you look now -- with so little effort!

One of the many tips in "Public Speaking: Get A's, Not Zzzzzz's!"

Today's humor

"The human brain starts working the moment you are born and never stops...until you stand up to speak in public."

~ Legendary actor/singer/public-speaker
   George Jessel  (1898-1981)

December Special on Coaching

I'm heading into week 4 of hearing, "Why don't we pick up again in the new year when things aren't so busy?"  I get the temptation, but as in so many years, this mentality causes the next few weeks to be a little quieter than normal for coaching...and then it'll get packed for January.

So I'm running these two specials for past clients:

  • 20% off any return client appointments between 12/17/15 and 1/8/16 -- for clients whom I haven't seen since at least July:  (offer good for both corporate and private clients)

  • 20% off any first timer initial consultation between 12/17/15 and 1/8/16 for anyone new referred to me by a past client  (this offer open to new private clients only, not corporate accounts)

Great chance to brush up those skills!  Call for details.  619-542-0761.

Today's featured video

Sometimes potential clients ask if I have video of myself coaching so that they can see me in action.  I wouldn't ask a client to sit there and allow his whole session to be taped, but I DO have a video from the keynote named after my book, "Public Speaking: Get A's, Not Zzzzzz's!" where one can see a few of the things that I talk about in coaching.  Enjoy!


See?  Told you the newsletters would be light and helpful.  Thanks for your patience; so pleased that it's finally going out.

If I can be of service to you, just use the button here to reach my site and drop me a line!   -- Milo


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Copyright 2015, Milo Shapiro.

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